Life. It [Continues]

Somedays, I'm hopelessly devoted to being sullen. (And I hate when I get like that)
But periods happen. And they end. (Thankfully)
So I'm pleased to announce that I am finally off the 'pax.
I've gotten over my Sunday through Monday night funk and since then, I have circled my brains, lassoed them up, and taken back the reins. Damn, it feels good.

In plainest terms:
I've learned that I must always be me. No matter what.

I've got to keep it steady. I've got to keep focus. I've got to keep occupied.

Because as I trudged through the crappy snow and piss cold wind earlier today, imagining just how nice and soothing it would be if only I had a deranged possum to coil my neck and warm my ear lobes, I realized that I really had lost focus on life these past couple of days.
(Play the audience sympathy coo)

BUT then I thought some and I realized.
I wasn't happy because I have to be thriving! I have to be producing! I have to be doing! And all of that...all of that creative nonsense...it wasn't taking place. It wasn't happening. No wonder I was so miserable.

Exclamation mark!
Epiphany!

RYAN! Just be!

I need to just be.
And let it be.

[Okay. Break time. What's it all mean huh? Why the crapshoot am I going on about something so meaningless...so pointless and Beatles esque...so uninteresting to anyone besides me and my lassoed brain? Well ya'll, I tell you.]

I think I've finally gotten my possum.
And he's giving me more than just fur heat. He's giving me perspective.

And baby.
Woah.

Don't assume it's just because I'm happily free from the monthly and I have a creature on my shoulder that I'm feeling pretty right and introspective..(Although that may have a lot to do with it...I'll admit)

No. It's more like I finally feel....I feel..this just happened...ready?.....I feel IT.
Yay-ah. How's that for broad and completely confusing? IT.
IT. IT. IT.

But do I REALLY got IT? Can I prove IT?
Is that possum finally wrapping its way into a comfortable, lasting position on my shoulder?
Does IT love me? Will IT hold me forever? Can IT be mine?
Oh Yes.

IT is.
So warm.

I think I'll keep IT. IT makes me me.
IT keeps me steady. IT keeps me focused. IT keeps me occupied.

And IT will be.
IT will Just Be.

Possum
I will always Be.